KT 63.29 — DM Home Opener 5-0 over Da Brownies

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KT 63.29 — DM Home Opener 5-0 over Da Brownies

Post by JRamirez » Mon May 26, 2025 12:30 pm

20630405 (Apr 5, '63)

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54,232 kame out to the local Kum & Go for the 2063 Des Moines Kernels home opener and they weren't disappointed: Steven Clayton (pictured), who led the Kernels with 15 wins last season, nailed down his first victory of this season, as he shut out the Brook Park Brownies (formerly Omaha Cyclones) through 6.1 innings, throwing 92 pitches, allowing three hits and one walk, striking out three. Ken 'Howl' Haworth (yes, we just thought up that nickname) closed out the remaining 2.2 innings. Da Brownies, in Cleveland?, loss their fourth straight. Some Abdul lost the game.

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Des Moines scored in the 4th, 5th, 6th, and 7th innings, using the drip method of winning, keeping the crowd in the game until alcohol sales were quenched and the Big Head race was won [more on this exciting new phenomenon to come in the pages of this blog!] Des Moines did what they are known for: hitting balls that clear the fence. They hit four against the Abdul. Ken'ichi Okubo (pictured), the hottest baseball card in the Heartland—and let's remember Iowa is the heart of the heartland—smashed his 3rd in four games of young 2063 as he looks ready to become a household name from Hokkaidol to here™.

Okubo, who last year increased both his bat speed and his base-stealing ability in the Des Moines Kernel Popper™, i.e., the Development Xenter (hell, why not spell it with an X?), this recent offseason augmented his defensive skills. He was on the trade block all offseason, with zero queries in interest.

Also hammering and homering in the Home Opener were All-Star RF Júlio Pérez, who punched his 2nd of the season, Wan-ling Koo, and 3B Félix 'Matchbox' Parreno. He has four steals his first six games. Parreno moved his career HR total to 477. It's rumored that sophomore non-flipped Rule 5 pick of last season, Dan Davidson, at-bat-less in six games, will steal some starts from Parreno. 2B Jesús Rosito got his fourth double.

"We don't think it was mistake to deal MM back to Phoenix," JR said, "And there's probably no GM in the Johnson League more in need of a handout than Sean Marko." This blog entry stops here so we can get an extra two PPTs covering Games 2 and 3 of the 2063 opening series in a separate TN, and also this one is long enough. That reminds me, come out to the local Kum & Go and Get Your Favorite Flavory, Savory Footlong Dogs at the local Kum & Go, where you can be sure of the best concessions in the game.
Des Moines Kernels, 2059 to present.
Confector of Piping Hot™ Microwave popcorn-you-can-bring-to-the-game. Like our team news, it's all in good taste™.

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