Palin Secures Blockbuster Membership; 2029, V9

[Bumstead]

What started out as one Blow the Holy Hell Doors Off Trade, suddenly became no trade, and then it became two trades. When asked about the "snafu" the Commissioner only had this to say, "Talk to the General Managers about their trades. I have no opinion on the exchange of players. I will say though, and I have reiterated this with the concerning parties, if you are going to be a General Manager in the BBA the least you could do is learn the correct process for handling business within the league. We have procedures for a reason; in the future I can only assume that we will all be on the same page." With that he stomped off muttering something about "6 players in a trade" and "dumbass Gm's." Who knows what any of that means.

The Seattle General Manager Nathan Eagan had this to say: "I don't know what the big deal was, but apparently someone shit in the Commissioners cereal so he decided to try and put a kabosh on our trade. In the end, Mr. Palin and I worked together to make sure that didn't happen. I don't see any future repercussions here, but you never know with this guy. I'm just happy that the trade is complete and we have some options with our pitching staff now and we created a little bit of budget room along the way."

When Mr. Palin was asked about the situation Mr Palin was strangely diplomatic about it all, "Eh, you know, as General Managers there are certain procedures we need to follow so that it never appears that the Commish is showing any favoritism toward any of the teams. Mr. Rectenwald was just doing his job. We worked it out and we all have a better understanding regarding expectations going forward. On another note, it looks like I somehow made Twin Cities fans happy with a trade. How did you miss that?"

Twin Cities fans seemed most happy about the addition of Kirk Burkett. Burkett is a fine defensive catcher that boasted a .767 OPS last season. He also boasts an $11.9M salary for 2029 but is eligible for free agency after that.

Twin Cities also added two prospects in the deal in Ray Cooper and Juan Romo.

Twin Cities did seem to give up a lot in this deal though with Seattle receiving Jose Morales, Jesus Sandoval, Juan Cruz, Hapmet Karabekir, Tony Canales and Andrew Lewis.

Since Dug Riddler was walking by we decided to ask him about his opinion on the deal: "I don't really have an opinion on the deal. Mr. Palin seems to be a little loosey goosey to me with all the trades, but he assures me that he there is a method to this madness. I'm not sure it's called winning though and I lied...he has assured me of nothing. He doesn't even talk to me about the trades. He just gloats about them in the office. Whatever, I'm going to get a drink. Bicycle..."

Twenty feet later, Riddler made a hard right turn into Tuggs Tavern and last time we checked he still hadn't come out. We didn't even realize Tuggs opened at 9am on Mondays. Well, now we know.