Off Topic
Fans Stage Protest (Again)
KLUB's METRICS FALL LIKE DEAD ROCK (AGAIN)
January 1, 2062 | Forever Land | Bikini Krill fans today created an uncomfortable situation for the second time as they blockaded the team's season ticket office for five hours more hours, and in tandem exercise again executed as denial of service attack on the club's social media checkout center. At its center was news that the Phoenix Talons Tokyo Pearls had signed Bikini washout Michael Buckley to a GBC Deal worth over $11M for two seasons.
"We want our Michael," said Marsha Grant, a real estate surveyor in Palm County, who took the day off work to picket the box office. "I'm not sure what we'll do without his .708 OPS for 256 plate appearances," added Lars Pritchard, professional video game player and Grant's live-in boyfriend. "The guy was a major part of the team. Everyone with eyes can see that."
Buckey had been with the team for several seasons, most of them disappointing (his 2056 was admittedly kind of spectacular, but that had been half a decade ago. It's perhaps of note that with the corner outfield slot being in some pursuit these days, no BBA team on the planet was willing to open the coffers to Buckley (which is what happens when a guy creates a total of .5 WAR over three seasons --a fact that does not seem to have deterred the Krill's primary fan base, which is now angry enough that the team's Fan Interest meter (a unitless index that the league calculates with super-secret algorithms) has dropped a complete two points from "51" to "53."
"In other words," said Misty Morgan, "The fan's protests are being effective to the tune of costing the Krill about 4% more of what was already about the league's least interested fan base. A total of 8% when you add in the earlier loss of Angel Villaneueva."
"We don't care if he can play a lick," Grant said. "We want our Mikey!"
KLUB's METRICS FALL LIKE DEAD ROCK (AGAIN)
- fans-sign-Michael.png (191.91 KiB) Viewed 407 times
"We want our Michael," said Marsha Grant, a real estate surveyor in Palm County, who took the day off work to picket the box office. "I'm not sure what we'll do without his .708 OPS for 256 plate appearances," added Lars Pritchard, professional video game player and Grant's live-in boyfriend. "The guy was a major part of the team. Everyone with eyes can see that."
Buckey had been with the team for several seasons, most of them disappointing (his 2056 was admittedly kind of spectacular, but that had been half a decade ago. It's perhaps of note that with the corner outfield slot being in some pursuit these days, no BBA team on the planet was willing to open the coffers to Buckley (which is what happens when a guy creates a total of .5 WAR over three seasons --a fact that does not seem to have deterred the Krill's primary fan base, which is now angry enough that the team's Fan Interest meter (a unitless index that the league calculates with super-secret algorithms) has dropped a complete two points from "51" to "53."
"In other words," said Misty Morgan, "The fan's protests are being effective to the tune of costing the Krill about 4% more of what was already about the league's least interested fan base. A total of 8% when you add in the earlier loss of Angel Villaneueva."
"We don't care if he can play a lick," Grant said. "We want our Mikey!"
