Madison Wolves - 2040 Fan Appreciation Day

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Madison Wolves - 2040 Fan Appreciation Day

Post by CTBrewCrew » Tue Nov 26, 2019 9:40 pm

AP Madison - As a thank you to Madison fans for their support throughout this transitional season, new Wolves management has decided that the final Friday night home game of the season vs. Louisville of the season will be "Fan Appreciation Day". All fans in attendance will receive a complimentary "3-wolf tee shirt" and all powers bestowed with it.

"Our fans deserve it" said new GM Mike Simon. "Previous ownership had held this promotion for only one lucky fan at the ball-park during past seasons. We think all our fans deserve to feel the raw power that comes with wearing one of these stylish shirts".

The shirt itself is elegantly silk-screened with images of the majestic wolf/wolves printed large and in optimal view to the peers of the wearer.
These wolf shirts generally possess an almost magnetic effect on women; who as if under a spell, cannot quench their insatiable lust for a man in a wolf shirt.

Don't believe us? Why just read the fan letters we have received over the course of this year...

“This shirt has changed my life! Before, I couldn’t walk through the aisles at Wal-Mart, graze on the buffet at Sizzler,
or even take in a round at my local miniature golf course, without people pointing and saying, “Hey, you’re that Zulu guy from Star Wars, aren’t you?” Even if I wore sunglasses, I’d still get mistaken for Yoko Ono. But with The Mountain Three Wolf Moon Short Sleeve Tee, the SHIRT now draws the eye.” – George Takei

“Received this shirt just in time for my job interview. After seeing my awesome attire, the interviewing manager offered me his job.
Of course I accepted.” – MelDownLow

“Once I apply the magical wolves fabric to my chest, my mullet grew like Odin’s beard.” – Scott

“Unfortunately I already had this exact picture tattooed on my chest, but this shirt is very useful in colder Wisconsin weather.” – overlook1977

“Before I got this shirt at last years promotion, I was an outcast. A nobody. My closest friends were a three-legged gerbil, a sun-faded Justin Bieber poster, and my senile grandmother who sports a mustache and thinks I’m Benny Hill. My life was the equivalent of a collection of mold growing on the underlip of a toilet that refuses to flush. All that changed the moment I put on this shirt and embraced the power of TWM.” – Gilbert Glib

“While wearing this T-Shirt, I am constantly approached by beautiful young women.” – C. Murphy

“This shirt sucks. I have gone through six of them. I AM DONE. Every time I put it on, my girlfriend immediately rips it off me.” – Curtis

“I just got my three wolf moon tee shirt as a birthday gift from my cousin in Wisconson, and at first I didn’t believe in the power. I am a Edmonton fan, and they were about to get swept by Charlotte, but I wished for a win and it happened!!!” – Cindy

“This wolf shirt is incredible. The first day I wore it I found five dollars on the sidewalk. To reward my good fortune, I treated myself
to a snow cone from a street vendor. Would you believe it? The snow cone wouldn’t melt! I still have it. I think it has something to do
with the arctic properties of the wolf shirt, which hasn’t melted either.” – S. Yasaki

I knew the Wolves were doing this promotion again this morning. Not because of the notification the team sent, but because I woke up with an intense rush of testosterone. I’ve always heard Willard Gagne talk about waking up in beast mode. Now I know what he’s talking about. He must own a Three Wolf Moon shirt as well. In all seriousness, the shirt fit extremely well as soon as I put it on. Physically, at least. Spiritually, I should have selected several sizes larger so that I can grow into it.

After about 5 minutes wearing it, I had this overwhelming urge to howl. So I let it out. Almost immediately after, my phone starting blowing up. Every girl that’s programmed in my phone began texting and calling. I even got some calls and texts from numbers that aren’t programmed. It was pretty crazy. That’s just one hidden power that this shirt possess. I’m sure I will discover other powers as our souls begin to merge into one.
To sum it up: This shirt contains deeply metaphysical powers. I guess that’s why people choose the Three Wolf Moon shirt. Or does the Three Wolf Moon shirt choose you? - Zach

Pros: This shirt doesn't just make you feel like more of a man, it actually makes you more of a man.
Cons: My wife hates this shirt, as every time I put it on, she turns into a sandwich-making love-slave. - LAD

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Re: Madison Wolves - 2040 Fan Appreciation Day

Post by shoeless.db » Tue Nov 26, 2019 9:46 pm

I’ll take your entire stock.
California Crusaders
Life is a bit more beautiful when time is measured by the half inning rather than the half hour. -- db "Shoeless" Olmsted

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