We Got Wood - 40.39 - Lumberjacks Uber to Game 1 Win

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We Got Wood - 40.39 - Lumberjacks Uber to Game 1 Win

Post by 7teen » Thu Nov 07, 2019 12:54 pm

In an odd turn of events today, the Portland Lumberjacks defeated the Chicago Black Sox in Chicago by the score of 6-3. The oddity of the whole day was that, after recent threats by Chicago owner Vinnie Vitale to tow the Portland team bus, the Lumberjacks players opted to UBER to the game instead of taking a team bus. The change of plans threw the Chicago front office for a loop and the team showed their own confusion by losing to an expansion team today.

"We're no fools" said GM Chris Wilson today, "they've been threatening to tow the bus after we play this week so we got out ahead of it today and privately contracted some uber drivers more than willing to take our players to the games. Many of which, suprisingly enough, were all the willing to do it. Some even did it for free.'

"Yeah, a lot of us Uber guys don't like Vinnie" said Jim Ignatowski, former cab driver and now Uber driver in Chicago. "He's towed a lot of our vehicles in the past and forced us to pay jacked up rates to get our cars from impound. Some even had their cars towed and never returned. So whatever we can do to stick it to Vinnie, we will!"

Of course things didn't go without a hiccup. Richard Wishart was an hour late for the game today when his Uber driver failed to get him to the game on-time. "I knew something was wrong pretty quickly" said Wishart. "When I looked up and we were in Wisconsin, I knew my guy was a rat. I hopped out at an intersection and caught another Uber back to the stadium. Luckily I got back unscathed."

Portland GM Chris Wilson did report he's called back in the federal investigators. Some eye witnesses are reporting the driver of Wishart's vehicle resembled Chicago GM Vic Caleca in a disguise.

More is to come on this developing story.
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Re: We Got Wood - 40.39 - Lumberjacks Uber to Game 1 Win

Post by HoosierVic » Thu Nov 07, 2019 1:36 pm

Time to go to the City Council of Calumet City about passing that Uber ban Vinnie's attorneys drafted for them this morning ...

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