He Who Walks Behind The Rows Vol. 1 Ep. 3

GM: Geoff Webb

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He Who Walks Behind The Rows Vol. 1 Ep. 3

Post by FuzzyRawley » Wed Apr 22, 2020 7:15 pm

Children of The Corn.jpg
10-19 Won-Loss, 128-190 RF-RA. Its been a ghastly month for the Kernels since Webb took over as GM. This whole time his focus was on the phantasm that lurked behing the corn rows just beyound the left-feild fence of Pat Tillman Park. Instead, it should have been focussed on the real beast that was stalking the Kernels between the foul poles. Its name was Louisville, which was french for Lewis Town. This horrific creature disembowled the Kernels over 8 games, feasting on the blood of Des Moines' pitching and sacrificing batters on a rough-hewn stone using a rusty scythe.

To make matters worse, in their haste to get the fuck out of there, the Kernels left behind pitchers Juan Garcia (sprained ankle) and the phenom Don Smith (strained back). Both were last seen languishing in IR hell.

Nevertheless, even in these darkest times, there are rays of light. The brightest being the acquisition of Mitch Dalrymple who landed in Des Moines in exchange for SS Antonio Suarez. Mitch is a popular player who no doubt will survive this horror flick, only to die right near the end when the audience is sure this team is about to escape the demon that is Louisville.

As the terror of the last month started to fade away, Webb turns his attention to signing his auto draft picks. Certainly, that couldn't be as bad as the last 31 days....or was it?
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Re: He Who Walks Behind The Rows Vol. 1 Ep. 3

Post by HoosierVic » Wed Apr 22, 2020 7:24 pm

Brilliant.

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Re: He Who Walks Behind The Rows Vol. 1 Ep. 3

Post by RonCo » Thu Apr 23, 2020 12:59 am

Louisville is actually French for Loserville.
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Re: He Who Walks Behind The Rows Vol. 1 Ep. 3

Post by lordtoffee » Fri Apr 24, 2020 5:55 pm

In this version of the world, what is going on in the Iowa cornfields?
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Re: He Who Walks Behind The Rows Vol. 1 Ep. 3

Post by FuzzyRawley » Sat Apr 25, 2020 9:50 am

As soon as I learned that Des Moines was going to be my team I couldn't help but remember this particularly terrifying movie I saw as a kid.



Probably need to read the Stephen King story now too.
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Re: He Who Walks Behind The Rows Vol. 1 Ep. 3

Post by 7teen » Sun Apr 26, 2020 10:12 am

Playing catch-up in reading.

Nice work.

Love the TN title.
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