Off Topic
KRILL PITCHER MAKES WAVES?
January 27, 2064 "What the hell is this?" Bikini general manager Ron Collins said as he stormed into the tiki office of Marie Manning, the team's Director of the Public Propoganda Team. He pushed a button on the pad he'd carried with him, and an override pushed a report onto the big wall across from Manning's desk.
The page read:
"Of course it's a news article, what do I look like?" Collins drew himself up a notch and ran his hand through his still full head of hair--which was lucky anymore, what with Monica Green playing all her Westy "Get out of Jail Free" cards every day of the week. "No," he said. "Don't answer that."
Manning sat silently.
"Did you do this?" Collins said.
"Of course I did."
"You did?"
"I can assure you that no piece of team news gets out without my say-so."
"Why? Can't you see this is going to piss off every fan in the world, just as season tickets are on sale?"
"We did it specifically because tickets are on sale, Ron." This time it was the voice of Green, coming from behind him.
"What?"
"There's no such thing as bad press," Manning said. "I called Jacky personally and asked him to stir the pot a bit."
"Why?"
"Seriously, Ron. Get with the program," Green says. "I mean, I think it would be better if you didn't use our team sessions as your daily naptime. Lavergne fits the whole marketing profile. He's a young gun"
"A little dreamy, too," Manning said, putting her chin on clasped hands and miming a swoon.
"The girls want him, the guys want to be him," Green kept on. "The guy throws 97 and gets hitters out. He's going to be a multi-millionaire soon. The guy puts the swash right in the old buckle, if you get the world today. Of course he should want to be in the bigs. That's what fans want to hear. This is a kid's game these days. And Krill fans want to hear about kids who want to play. The more precocious the better."
Collins stood there, stymied. "I see."
"Don't believe us?" Manning said, standing now, and pushing a new report to the full-screen that was the far wall. "Here's our current season ticket sales."
Collins scanned the chart.
"Number go up," he whispered.
"Exactly," Green said, coming to stand next to Manning. "Number go up 30%."
"Hmm." Collins took a deep breath. "I see. Maybe it might make some sense to let people know that the plan is to send Lavergne to AAA for a season so he can team up with Hoyt Shiplack. You know, veteran catcher mentors an electric arm?
"Kind of a Crash and Nuke thing," Green said, smiling. "And to think I once said you can't teach an old dog new tricks."
Manning glanced at Green with a mischievous smile that made Collins have darker thoughts. "We'll market it a s Lavernge and Shiplack," she said. "Schlemiel, schlimazel--"
"Hasenpfeffer incorporated," Green finished Manning's sentence.
The pair linked arms and skipped out of the office.
Collins took in the two of them, sensing a bond that hadn't been there before and feeling an eeriness around the idea that maybe he had a new antagonist to deal with, but not able to put his finger on it.
"All right," he said to himself as he turned to leave. "Let's make it happen."
January 27, 2064 "What the hell is this?" Bikini general manager Ron Collins said as he stormed into the tiki office of Marie Manning, the team's Director of the Public Propoganda Team. He pushed a button on the pad he'd carried with him, and an override pushed a report onto the big wall across from Manning's desk.
The page read:
"It looks like a news article," Manning said.Riding buses from game to game has gotten old for Triple A starting pitcher, Jacky Lavergne. Recently we caught up with Lavergne and he expressed his readiness to get to the big leagues. Said the 20 year old, "Look man, I've learned everything I can learn in the minors. I'm tired of the crap motels, the bumpy road trips and the junky small towns. I'm better than this."
Kid Wants Onto
The Rock
He may or may not be ready for the big show but his comments are sure not to go over well with fans or the organization.
"Of course it's a news article, what do I look like?" Collins drew himself up a notch and ran his hand through his still full head of hair--which was lucky anymore, what with Monica Green playing all her Westy "Get out of Jail Free" cards every day of the week. "No," he said. "Don't answer that."
Manning sat silently.
"Did you do this?" Collins said.
"Of course I did."
"You did?"
"I can assure you that no piece of team news gets out without my say-so."
"Why? Can't you see this is going to piss off every fan in the world, just as season tickets are on sale?"
"We did it specifically because tickets are on sale, Ron." This time it was the voice of Green, coming from behind him.
"What?"
"There's no such thing as bad press," Manning said. "I called Jacky personally and asked him to stir the pot a bit."
"Why?"
"Seriously, Ron. Get with the program," Green says. "I mean, I think it would be better if you didn't use our team sessions as your daily naptime. Lavergne fits the whole marketing profile. He's a young gun"
"A little dreamy, too," Manning said, putting her chin on clasped hands and miming a swoon.
"The girls want him, the guys want to be him," Green kept on. "The guy throws 97 and gets hitters out. He's going to be a multi-millionaire soon. The guy puts the swash right in the old buckle, if you get the world today. Of course he should want to be in the bigs. That's what fans want to hear. This is a kid's game these days. And Krill fans want to hear about kids who want to play. The more precocious the better."
Collins stood there, stymied. "I see."
"Don't believe us?" Manning said, standing now, and pushing a new report to the full-screen that was the far wall. "Here's our current season ticket sales."
Collins scanned the chart.
"Number go up," he whispered.
"Exactly," Green said, coming to stand next to Manning. "Number go up 30%."
"Hmm." Collins took a deep breath. "I see. Maybe it might make some sense to let people know that the plan is to send Lavergne to AAA for a season so he can team up with Hoyt Shiplack. You know, veteran catcher mentors an electric arm?
"Kind of a Crash and Nuke thing," Green said, smiling. "And to think I once said you can't teach an old dog new tricks."
Manning glanced at Green with a mischievous smile that made Collins have darker thoughts. "We'll market it a s Lavernge and Shiplack," she said. "Schlemiel, schlimazel--"
"Hasenpfeffer incorporated," Green finished Manning's sentence.
The pair linked arms and skipped out of the office.
Collins took in the two of them, sensing a bond that hadn't been there before and feeling an eeriness around the idea that maybe he had a new antagonist to deal with, but not able to put his finger on it.
"All right," he said to himself as he turned to leave. "Let's make it happen."
