2038.18 Aviators gain leadership

[felipe]

The Wichita Aviators moved today to fill a gaping hole in their big league roster...a hole that is impossible to quantify or place a value on. So a pretty deep hole I would guess...I mean...if you can't see how deep it is or even measure it...although I guess you could also say that there is no hole...because if you can't see or measure it...

Regardless, losing veteran captains Clough, Scholes, and Watson to retirement in the offseason, left the Aviators with a massive leadership void on the big league club.

Any club with two pranksters on the team (Cherono and Guerrero), two unmotivated gits (Torres and Miura), and a veteran that isn't afraid to speak out whatever is on his mind, (Colbert), needs some veteran leadership to keep the team on course and on the same page.

First the club brought up minor league journeyman, thirty year old backup catcher Ricardo Arellano, from AA Columbus, where Arellano was enjoying his semi-retirement, after three stress-full seasons playing for perennial sad-sack San Antonio. Arellano has a career .622 OPS and has amassed 0.1 WAR in three big league seasons.

"I dunno," shrugged Arellano," I just scream at the younger guys at the club...and I make 'em shine my shoes...some call it bullying, some call it leadership...I don't care...$500,000 is a lot more than I make in the minors...going on road trips to Vegas and Hawaii is pretty cool too."

Next, the Aviators claimed a player on waivers who wasn't even good enough to play for Boise last season, twenty-eight year old English third baseman Tom Coulthard. Wichita had already signed the guy from Boise that had played in front of Coulthard last season, (Schneider), a week ago, and they already possess their own two third baseman from last season, Driscoll and Guerrero.

"You know what they say," grinned Wichita Genius, GM Hopkins," Having four third baseman...well five I guess if you count Pena...is the hallmark of a well run team...remember Mike Schmidt for the Phillies and the other four guys he shared third base with?"

"Yeah, I know," sighed the Genius, his head in his hands," Its a goddam mess."

Coulthard was thrilled. "They're paying me $1.2 million dollars! You see where we're going next week? Vegas baby! Free paid vacation!"

"Its great," Coulthard smiled," I sound like Cloughie and Scholesy when I talk, so the ignorant American ballplayers think I'm a Hall of Famer too...wankers."


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