2047-0001: Talons GM Receives Urgent, High Level Communique from Governing Board Office, Contents Reportedly Classified

[jiminyhopkins]

Phoenix, AZ--

The reclusive Talons GM today was "served" with a high level communique from the esteemed BBA Governing Board this morning. While the contents of this message are reportedly classified, one can only speculate if it has anything to do with the historic levels of inactivity that issued forth from the since laid off Talons Electronic Media and Forum Posting Department this past season.

"As it turns out, when you lay off a bunch of people, work just doesn't get done like it used to," the reclusive GM said. "Also, it turns out that if you consistently have a mediocre team, you'll end up missing the playoffs every year, as we have seen."

He continued. "Guess it's time to get off my ass and do something, give the Talons Team News Fan Club and Appreciation Society what they want: more irreverent, sardonic content for them to occasionally comment upon and mostly ignore!"

"Now having said that, I'm tired from working all night at the local neighborhood iron smelter so I'm going to bed. Maybe I'll write an actual Team News tomorrow."

With that, the GM signed off and went upstairs. And, for you Team News purists, here's a stat: Pankratz Isekenmier has set a career low in WAR with 2 last season, the first of his shiny 5 year contract extension. Yay!

[aaronweiner]

Breaking news. We’ve identified both the source and the contents of this communique. It was me, and I asked him what he was trying to accomplish by his recent behavior.

No answer was forthcoming, but I did apparently get this team news in response.

[jiminyhopkins]

Breaking news. We’ve identified both the source and the contents of this communique. It was me, and I asked him what he was trying to accomplish by his recent behavior.

No answer was forthcoming, but I did apparently get this team news in response.

LOL I wasn't actually going to say who wrote the message or what was in it, but if you want to cop to it, suit yourself haha.

This is gonna generate a ton of future team news material!

[tylertoo]

[shoeless.db]

I came down with Pankratz Isenkenmier as a kid. I had to stay home from school for three days.

[CTBrewCrew]

I came down with Pankratz Isenkenmier as a kid. I had to stay home from school for three days.

.....nah those are great polish perogi. I love my Pankratz Isenkenmier with some sour cream and beer...