2037-02: Talons Release Statement About Laloosh

[jiminyhopkins]

"Lawrence Columbus LaLoosh is a rat bastard!"

Talons GM Sean Marko made his feelings known in no uncertain terms about the best pitcher available on this year's free agent market.

"I mean, what the hell does this guy want?" he continued. "Can't this dumbass see that we are doing everything we can here? I mean the budget is common knowledge. We have made our best, last and final offer like three times now and we keep getting messages that say things like 'You're not offering enough coin for me to sign here' and 'Good luck finding a starting pitcher'. Is that anyway to reply to a team that wants to give you like 130 million dollars?"

"It's clear that his former team doesn't want him. It's clear that he's getting older, and his pitches might be losing a tick of sharpness. It's true that he can only get worse from here. But the Talons just need one more guy to get back to the playoffs," The GM continued.

"He could come in here and be a hero, but no, the selfish prick is just worried about how much "coin" he is going to make. What a joke. Good riddance!"