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"Hey wake up, dumbass. The All Star Game is today. And its HERE."
That was the text message sent to the Talons Reclusive GM this morning, among many others exhorting him to wake up, take some Vyvanse, and get moving. Apparently, the annual BBA All Star Game is today, and its here in Phoenix, and the front office for some reason didn't have a clue.
"Well we found this logo on the interwebs while we were searching for memes. So naturally we concluded that it was a joke," said Talons Electronic Media And Forum Posting Department director David Frum. "We just didn't take it seriously. I mean look at it, the damn thing even has the logo of our AAA team. Yeah it looks great, but how were we supposed to know that it was real?? By the way, we love the cactus because it kind of looks like a middle finger," Frum observed.
So, the Talons got to work. They went to Menards and bought a bunch of red, white, and blue ribbons and bunting. They ordered extra raw fish for the famous $3.01 Sushi concession stands. They went out and found some sponsors. They even opened the high sections of the top deck of the stadium, which have been covered in tarp -- Oakland A's style -- since 2045. The Talons have also reached out to the BBA office to see if they can get today's gate receipts added to the team's coffers.
And thus, just an hour (or so) ago, the 2049 Denny's BBA All Star Game And Fan Fest Presented By Subaru was born.
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Despite the best efforts, however, the fans seem confused by today's developments. One fan stated: "What the hell is going on here? I thought it was an off day, but the place is filling up quick. And look, just look at these players taking batting practice. It just doesn't make sense. I mean. they're actually good!"
