2063 - Sacramento Mad Popes

[CTBrewCrew]

Sacramento Mad Popes 2063 Season Preview: Hopes, Hymns, and Wins




By the Baseball Rosary – March Edition

Last Three Years of Divine Dominance

Year	W	L	WPct	Finish	GB	Exp Rec	Diff	AVG	ERA	BABIP	Playoffs	Champion	Attendance
2060	108	54	.667	1st	–	112-50	-4	.285	2.99	.263	Yes	No	4,954,764
2061	106	56	.654	1st	–	103-59	+3	.278	3.14	.262	Yes	No	4,476,719
2062	95	68	.583	1st	–	100-63	-5	.278	3.26	.264	Yes	No	4,937,221

The Cathedral of Sacramento has not hoisted a championship chalice since their recent Holy Trinity of division titles began, but year after year, the Popes continue to preach the gospel of October relevance.

What's New in the Diocese?

A Coastal Conversion: GM Ben Heuring's Pilgrimage West
Longtime Brooklyn GM Ben Heuring heard the call, swapped coasts, and joined the Popes’ papal conclave. In a move worthy of canonization, he brought with him his favorite closer, Cade Miller, proving once again that all roads lead to Sacramento... eventually.

Major Offseason Confessions (Signings)

SP Sakutaro Kawano – Signed to a 6-year, $78M vow of pitching excellence.
This seasoned monk of the mound brings over 2,300 innings of battle-worn experience to the Popes’ rotation. After leading the San Antonio in incense and WAR in 2058 and 2059, he had a spiritual dip in 2060 before a resurrection in 2061. A faithful addition meant to replace the departed Barney Lindsay (RIP...to free agency).

CL Cade Miller – The Reliever Reincarnate
Traded from Cobble Hill, but his soul has bounced from Louisville to Brooklyn and now to the Vatican West. 131 career saves and a holy WHIP of 1.31. This bullpen shepherd will be trusted to slam the door shut on any infidels in the ninth.

Departures from the Holy Order

The Popes lost 5.3 WAR worth of talent this offseason, including:

– SP Barney Lindsay (Free Agent): Gone but not forgotten, likely replaced by Kawano in the rotation.
– SS Badr Isam (2.9 WAR, signed with Rosenblatt): A slick-fielding choirboy now singing elsewhere.
– 3B Roberto Villanueva (Twin Cities), CL Ludwig Werberg (Louisville), and RP Steve Warren (Portland) also received excommunication notices.

Rule 5 Rapture?

The Popes lost four players in the Rule 5 Draft, including RP Yerik Lejnin and LF Vasily Augustoff. We can only pray they don't come back to haunt us.

Roster Revelations: Your Opening Day Lineup

POS	PLAYER	NOTES
C	John Kinsella	The eternal backstop – 1,500+ games behind the plate and still preaching plate discipline.
1B	Chinh Tran-Nhu	Preaches patience—unless the pitch is inside.
2B	Yoshitora Goto	A revelation at second base last season (.856 OPS, 3.6 WAR).
SS	Daniel Kenner	Struggled mightily in 2062 – in need of a miracle... or a sabbatical.
3B	Mohammed bin Mus’ad	Popes’ most valuable saint (6.8 WAR), and still under 30. Amen.
LF	Naif Abdul-Latif	Short sample last year but holy power (.503 SLG).
CF	Lou Bayou	Career .304 hitter and certified Vatican speedster (375 SB). Bow down.
RF	Norio Yoshida	Balanced bat, heavenly patience. A rock in the corner.
DH	Callum Browne	.835 OPS with 35 bombs – a true designated disciple.

Projected Starting Rotation

Role	Name	Note
SP1	Sakutaro Kawano	Throws more strikes than a vengeful archangel.
SP2	Jamie Barber	Baptizes hitters with 94 mph heat.
SP3	Mario Reyes	Walks too many—but only through the valley of death.
SP4	Michihiro Tanaka	Delivers sermons from the rubber every fifth day.
SP5	Joe King	Miraculously still effective—must have holy pine tar.

This holy rotation returns mostly intact, just with Kawano taking the pulpit left by Lindsay. Expect more sermons on Sunday, and fewer sins on the stat sheet.

Outlook: Marching Toward October with a Rosary in One Hand and a Bat in the Other

Sacramento remains the class of the FL Pacific – a blessed blend of proven veterans, quiet achievers, and just enough pitching to keep the demons at bay. Can they finally ascend beyond the postseason purgatory that has plagued them these past three years?

If the bullpen holds (pray for Cade), and the bats deliver righteous power (looking at you, Mus’ad and Browne), the Popes could make a serious push for their first championship since the Great Reformation of 2053.

Either way, expect packed pews at the Basillica, where the faithful will gather for another season of holy war... on the basepaths.

Prediction: 98-64, 1st in the FL Pacific.
Baptism by Fire? We say the Popes finally get past the second round. Someone light the incense.

[lordtoffee]

Thanks for the preview Mike, and loved the theme you went for in the preview.

I like that we have a strong pitching staff that gives us the depth to compete, and feel that our offense is in a good place even with standing pat. The way I change my reputation is to win with the Mad Popes.