Off Topic
“Concern for the Players” Drives Humanitarian Proposal
March 17, 2065: Marshall Islands — With spring training winding down, teams are busily working to pare out the wheat from the chaff in the process of getting their active rosters set and aligning their organization’s needs down through the minors.
Amid this backdrop comes news that the Bikini club is considering the submission to the Office of the Commissioner ( @recte44 ) of a formal petition to increase the size of the secondary roster from 40 players up to 45.
“Clearly it would be in the players’ interest to add five more slots, after all,” an anonymous source told this reporter. “Five more guys on major league contracts would be a good thing, right? You’ve got to think of the little guys—you know. The guys toiling away in the minors all their lives. Getting five more guys on that list would be a real feelgood thing for the league. We’re thinking about it as a major PR boost.”
That does sound good, now, doesn’t it?
Pay no attention to the “talent” stacked in the team’s current secondary roster, or the idea that some of them—if waived per the current rules—might well find roles on big-league teams.
Insiders are noting, however, that certain players who are not currently on the 40-player rosters would look pretty good in Bikini uniforms, but could be delayed in modelling them due to sexoncary slots being tough gets. Guys like Jesús Saucedo, Jacky Lavergne, Héctor Jiménez, and Ken Haupt (among others) could see time in the big leagues this year, but like a group of teenagers sharing a single brain sell, there are only so many slots left to go around.
“This idea is such a no-brainer that even the Commish will see its merits. We’re expecting a fast-track approval, so we’re preparing the printer to make an additional set of big-leagues checks in real time.”
Stay tuned for fallout.
March 17, 2065: Marshall Islands — With spring training winding down, teams are busily working to pare out the wheat from the chaff in the process of getting their active rosters set and aligning their organization’s needs down through the minors.
Amid this backdrop comes news that the Bikini club is considering the submission to the Office of the Commissioner ( @recte44 ) of a formal petition to increase the size of the secondary roster from 40 players up to 45.
“Clearly it would be in the players’ interest to add five more slots, after all,” an anonymous source told this reporter. “Five more guys on major league contracts would be a good thing, right? You’ve got to think of the little guys—you know. The guys toiling away in the minors all their lives. Getting five more guys on that list would be a real feelgood thing for the league. We’re thinking about it as a major PR boost.”
That does sound good, now, doesn’t it?
Pay no attention to the “talent” stacked in the team’s current secondary roster, or the idea that some of them—if waived per the current rules—might well find roles on big-league teams.
Insiders are noting, however, that certain players who are not currently on the 40-player rosters would look pretty good in Bikini uniforms, but could be delayed in modelling them due to sexoncary slots being tough gets. Guys like Jesús Saucedo, Jacky Lavergne, Héctor Jiménez, and Ken Haupt (among others) could see time in the big leagues this year, but like a group of teenagers sharing a single brain sell, there are only so many slots left to go around.
“This idea is such a no-brainer that even the Commish will see its merits. We’re expecting a fast-track approval, so we’re preparing the printer to make an additional set of big-leagues checks in real time.”
Stay tuned for fallout.
