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Fans Ecstatic For Late- Season Arrival
September 2, 2058: Vancouver – News comes today that with one game left in the AAA seasons, the Bikini Krill have signed 33-year-old infielder Felipe Reyna to a 1-season minor league contract that included a $20,000 signing bonus.
Fans across Global Bikini Fandom reacted sharply and with great fervor, immediately rushing to online VR stores to acquire their digital certificates of excitement at the acquisition, each file uniquely coded with its own configurable image of Renya in various defensive poses. The files are also good for a free Kini Iced Tea at the Forever Land concessions during their next trip to the Atoll resort complex. Other fans made "Felipe, Felipe, Go, go go!" Cosmos and held signing parties where they ate caviar and atomically built delicacies with a half-life of 24 hours that had been designed for just such an occasion. My favorite is the "where'd it go pâté said one such party goer. It's glorious in the moment, but leaves no aftertaste. Easily worth the money.
“We’ll certainly assign Felipe to the Pasco organization in order to shake off any rust he might have acquired, but we’re not sure that team is going to make the post season, so we’ll have to see what happens next,” GM Ron Collins said. “It may not be in time to actually play at all. And, really, that might be for the best. But we knew our fans would love imagining a consummate professional like him in a Bikini uniform, so when the opportunity to grab a headline like this came along, it was a natural fit.”
That’s probably a true statement, seeing as how most people had probably forgotten about him, so the opportunity to sign a contract that will, effectively a day later, most likely leave him as a free agent again at least raised his profile. Maybe someone will a (next year) 34-year-old second baseman who can’t really hit and has the range of a tortoise more seriously than they otherwise would have.
In the meantime, Reyna is happy.
“I think I look great in a uniform, don’t you?”
Yes, you do, Felipe. Even if it’s for just one day.
September 2, 2058: Vancouver – News comes today that with one game left in the AAA seasons, the Bikini Krill have signed 33-year-old infielder Felipe Reyna to a 1-season minor league contract that included a $20,000 signing bonus.
Fans across Global Bikini Fandom reacted sharply and with great fervor, immediately rushing to online VR stores to acquire their digital certificates of excitement at the acquisition, each file uniquely coded with its own configurable image of Renya in various defensive poses. The files are also good for a free Kini Iced Tea at the Forever Land concessions during their next trip to the Atoll resort complex. Other fans made "Felipe, Felipe, Go, go go!" Cosmos and held signing parties where they ate caviar and atomically built delicacies with a half-life of 24 hours that had been designed for just such an occasion. My favorite is the "where'd it go pâté said one such party goer. It's glorious in the moment, but leaves no aftertaste. Easily worth the money.
“We’ll certainly assign Felipe to the Pasco organization in order to shake off any rust he might have acquired, but we’re not sure that team is going to make the post season, so we’ll have to see what happens next,” GM Ron Collins said. “It may not be in time to actually play at all. And, really, that might be for the best. But we knew our fans would love imagining a consummate professional like him in a Bikini uniform, so when the opportunity to grab a headline like this came along, it was a natural fit.”
That’s probably a true statement, seeing as how most people had probably forgotten about him, so the opportunity to sign a contract that will, effectively a day later, most likely leave him as a free agent again at least raised his profile. Maybe someone will a (next year) 34-year-old second baseman who can’t really hit and has the range of a tortoise more seriously than they otherwise would have.
In the meantime, Reyna is happy.
“I think I look great in a uniform, don’t you?”
Yes, you do, Felipe. Even if it’s for just one day.
