July 30, 2058: Forever Land – News today comes that the Bikini Krill claimed Long Beach infielder Jim Vineyard on waivers, likely indicating the answer to the question of what happens when the team doesn’t have Wilson Andrade to kick back and forth from the Designated For Assignment list anymore.
Vineyard (26) was hitting .292/.326/.331 in 141 plate appearances with the Surfers, but his infield glove will likely be a bigger impact. Forever Land Sports Network anchor Misty Morgan seemed positive on the claim. “He’s not going to be one of those guys who powers the offense for big parts of the year, but he can do some things now and again, and when he does it’s kind of like finding long-lost crypto jumpwallets in the cracks of your sofa while in VR world. But we’ve all been watching Wilson Andrade trying to play anything but third base for a couple years now, and not having to see that again is probably the biggest part of this selection.”
Vineyard plays all around the infield, and is arguably of Zimmer quality at second base, so one suspects he will immediately back up slugger Napolean Mellott at second, and spell rookie Keith Williams when he gets fatigued.
Vineyard, a native New Yorker, was a little apprehensive about the idea of playing on the Atoll, but seemed intrigued. “I spoke to Richard (Bikini manager Richard Lawson) a little bit again and I’m happy to come to a team that has a plan for me. I admit I like their park, though it seems kind of weird in certain ways to have a baseball field surrounded by ocean.”
To make room for him, Wilson Andrade was once again placed on the DFA list.
"It's all good," Andrade said after hearing the news. "I don't want to be here, either."
“We would love to fine a contending team that needs a veteran presence who can still hit a little and can still pick it at third,” said GM Ron Collins. “But that’s up to the fates of the Trade Deadline. We’re doing what we can to make him happy, but it takes two to do the foxtrot.”