57.13- Reinforcements Arrive

[chicoruiz]

Well... My resolution to improve the team by one percent every week was tested this week. I had a couple of players go on the injured list for fairly long periods of time recently, and rather than dip into the minors, I tried to fill their spots by dipping into the lower levels of the free agent market.

Outfielder Michael Harris has a herniated disc in his neck. Unfortunately, when I announced it at the press conference, I misspoke and referred to it as a "herniated dick", and there was much laughter at my expense. Anyway, Harris was our lone all-star representative last season, so it kind of sucks to lose him, but in all honestly, his performance this year has been pretty ghastly, so trying out someone else isn't the end of the world.

The "someone else" I'm trying out is Ralph Kennedy. Ralph is almost 34 years old, and his sole big league experience to this point has been 12 games with Hawaii in 2049. But he can definitely go get it in center field, and he's had a couple of decent years with the bat at AAA Surprise. So he's getting his "better late than never" shot now, and I'm glad; he seems like a nice guy.

Then I needed to replace utility infielder Sam Kelley. He's on the 60-day list with bone chips in his elbow. Between that and his 1 for 16 start, there's definitely an opportunity here, and the guy who's getting the first shot at it is Raul Lopez. Lopez is a sprightly 36 years old, and his last big league experience was with El Paso all the way back in 2047. And let me tell you, I was the GM of that team, and calling it a big league team might be stretching the truth. That was the notorious 37-125 team that set a record for futility that still haunts me. So why Raul? Well, he can still pick it at all the infield positions. And he was happy to sign; most of the guys who were on the 2047 Chilis can't even get jobs clerking at convenience stores.

So did I achieve my "one percent better" goal this week? I guess... the guys I replaced were pretty bad this year, so almost anything would be an improvement. It's always nice to give opportunities to guys who have been slogging it out in the minors for ages. Still... it would be even nicer if at least one of them could actually play.

[RonCo]

'Herniated dick." That's gotta hurt.