Say, Who's the Barber Here?
12/01/2055
Brianna Robles, Starscreams contributor

Barber, like many relievers, can hit 100 mph on the gun. His repertoire is limited to two pitches, a 12-6 curveball and a sinking fastball, and he's effective against both right-handed and left-handed hitters. This pitch combination also tends to lead to ground ball outs, something the Stars at least used to be known for themselves.
Lindsay has a career ERA of 3.91, a FIP- of 94, and a WAR of 3.0. Most recently, he tallied a 2.49 ERA, FIP- of 76, and a WAR of 1.2 in 2055, and has an ERA of 2.81 over the course of the past three seasons. Durability and reliability are Barber's hallmarks. He tires slowly, and recovers quickly. He has not once been placed on the IL during his pro career. And I'm super sure I haven't jinxed him simply by writing that.
Barber's contract with the Stars includes two guaranteed years, with a player option for 2058, which will be his age thirty-three season.