Big J's Catering
Preferred Caterer
fireshoeless.com
So why is that propane-sniffing donkey-breeder in the corner office for the Mad Popes allowed to crumble the foundation of our great baseball franchise with thoughtless trades after thoughtless trade after idiotic transaction? People are paying a hell of a lot more of their money to watch the Popes than they are for my ribs, but Shoeless cares very little for the product he's putting out on the field. In fact, an objective look at his recent moves leads me to believe he's treating Sacramento just as Betty's Gramma's Ribs wastes quality meat by rubbing all manners of drab spicy torment on it, then smoking those ribs so long Marlboro comes threatening a lawsuit for infringement on their cigarette patent (Note to Betty: Your grandma couldn't tell the difference between a rotting goose breast and a St. Louis brisket).
After watching his Mad Popes limp to an 11-14 record, far below even the bleakest expectations, Shoeless went and traded three quality pitching prospects for some kid who happens to know how to catch a ball. And, let me tell you, scouts rave about how this guy can move his mitt to where a thrown ball is going. Like, how is that even a thing? What am I missing? Don't all major leaguers know how to move their glove to where the ball is? How can one guy do it better?
To make matters worse, this kid, this world champion at Game of Catch, has the nickname Shoeless. Did GM Shoeless trade away half our farm just to tickle his vanity?
Fire this Betty's Gramma's Ribs disaster of a general manager.
Fire Shoeless!
