41.26 Open Letter to David Simpson
Posted: Wed Feb 12, 2020 9:04 am
Dear David Simpson,
Hey, would you mind pretending to be half the ballplayer you've shown yourself to be the past two seasons? I mean, the Crusaders are four games down to some squad from Canada all because your sorry ass decided to mail in 2041. You're about 50 points down in both batting average and on base percentage from a year ago, and, frankly, I can't keep declining Anton Vogts requests to have you analyzed by team doctor Dr. Frankenham Kocherschmeltz. Vogts is certain an afternoon appointment could correct some issues in your swing and the amount of effort you bring to the games.
There were streaks last year where you completely carried the squad offensively. You were our lone hero in a train wreck of a lineup. Now, this season, with several younger players having breakout years, like Po-sin Shi and Jorge Lugo, you decide to shit the bed.
I'm waiting for the real David "Horrible" Simpson who is rummaging inside that sorry sack of a man you've been this season to burst out of all this funk. Why don't you ponder the crazy idea of throwing this talented team of misfits on your back and carrying us straight to a Landis?
Get your poop in a group!
GM Shoeless
Hey, would you mind pretending to be half the ballplayer you've shown yourself to be the past two seasons? I mean, the Crusaders are four games down to some squad from Canada all because your sorry ass decided to mail in 2041. You're about 50 points down in both batting average and on base percentage from a year ago, and, frankly, I can't keep declining Anton Vogts requests to have you analyzed by team doctor Dr. Frankenham Kocherschmeltz. Vogts is certain an afternoon appointment could correct some issues in your swing and the amount of effort you bring to the games.
There were streaks last year where you completely carried the squad offensively. You were our lone hero in a train wreck of a lineup. Now, this season, with several younger players having breakout years, like Po-sin Shi and Jorge Lugo, you decide to shit the bed.
I'm waiting for the real David "Horrible" Simpson who is rummaging inside that sorry sack of a man you've been this season to burst out of all this funk. Why don't you ponder the crazy idea of throwing this talented team of misfits on your back and carrying us straight to a Landis?
Get your poop in a group!
GM Shoeless