2040.26 PPP; Kouros Extended
Posted: Wed Nov 27, 2019 10:46 am
Popes Playing Pepper
with Sai and Aarav
SAI -- Welcome to another episode of Triple P. I'm your host, Sai "Young" Ahuji, and with me, as always, is the man who had freeze-tag outlawed at his niece's elementary school, Aarav "the Mad Pope of Mumbai" Patil.
AARAV -- Tag can be very difficult on self-esteem. Freeze tag doubly-so.
SAI -- Do you know what else can be difficult on self-esteem? [grins at the camera] Your face, Aarav. [chuckles to himself]
AARAV -- You're an idiot. And, how are you back hosting this show and just pretending nothing odd happened during our last episode?
SAI -- Last episode? I don't recall.
AARAV -- You were hearing a "whoosh, whoosh" noise, remember?
SAI -- No, I don't recall. [picks up the papers on his desk] I was also informed I misheard.
AARAV -- Wait. What? You don't recall or you misheard?
SAI -- Yes. [straightens up] Today's top story on Triple P ...
AARAV -- Yes to what?
SAI -- Recently acquired lead-off extraordinaire and endearing freak of all of Greece, Quant Kouros signed a six-year extension with the California Crusaders this past week. The deal will pay Kouros $55 million over six seasons ($14.2/$11.5/$8.5/$7.5/$7.5(to)/$6(to)) and ensure the two-time Charles Puckett Award winner will play the heart of what should be his most productive years in a Crusader uniform.
AARAV -- Who said you misheard?
SAI -- The extension with Kouros was a major priority for General Manager Shoeless once the deal landing Kouros in California was made official with Vegas. With more on the extension, our top unpaid intern Wasim Jeffers Jr. is standing by. Wasim?
WASIM -- It's Jaffer. Wasim Jaffer Jr. You've been saying Jeffers ever since we came to California.
SAI -- Jaffer, huh? Odd, I could have sworn it was Jeffers. [turns to Aarav] See, I mishear things all the time. [turns back to the camera] With more on the extension, our top unpaid intern Wasim Jaffer Jr. is standing by. Wasim?
WASIM -- Thank you, Sai. According to one California executive I spoke with, the acquisition and extension of Kouros has many within the organization hopeful the long and successful run by the prior administration will continue under the current GM. But, others pointed to the acquisition of Hakim Ngowa last season as proof to the rumors that GM Shoeless is, in fact, clueless when it comes to general managing a professional sports team. Only time will tell, I suppose.
SAI -- That is true -- not a great take for a sports-talk program, but, I guess, it's the best we can expect from just an intern.
WASIM -- What the...
SAI -- Were you able to speak to GM Shoeless concerning the extension?
WASIM -- Just an intern? [turns away from the camera while mouthing a count to ten; turns back to the camera] I wasn't able to get a quote from GM Shoeless on the matter. I hate to speculate, especially as I'm just an intern, but something is not right with our general manager lately. Normally, he's very much a creature of habit -- eats the same breakfast and watches film at 9 every morning; BMs are regular and healthy. But, lately, he's been aloof. I often see him mumbling to himself and looking towards the sky. He looks like he hasn't had a good night's sleep in weeks. It's all just ... odd.
SAI -- I was informed to say it's just the stress of the pennant chase.
WASIM -- Hmm, I suppose that would ...
AARAV -- Wait. Wait. Wait. Who's informing you of these things, Sai? Who said that?
SAI -- Well, that wraps up another episode of Triple P. We'll be seeing you at the ballpark, Crusader fans!
with Sai and Aarav
SAI -- Welcome to another episode of Triple P. I'm your host, Sai "Young" Ahuji, and with me, as always, is the man who had freeze-tag outlawed at his niece's elementary school, Aarav "the Mad Pope of Mumbai" Patil.
AARAV -- Tag can be very difficult on self-esteem. Freeze tag doubly-so.
SAI -- Do you know what else can be difficult on self-esteem? [grins at the camera] Your face, Aarav. [chuckles to himself]
AARAV -- You're an idiot. And, how are you back hosting this show and just pretending nothing odd happened during our last episode?
SAI -- Last episode? I don't recall.
AARAV -- You were hearing a "whoosh, whoosh" noise, remember?
SAI -- No, I don't recall. [picks up the papers on his desk] I was also informed I misheard.
AARAV -- Wait. What? You don't recall or you misheard?
SAI -- Yes. [straightens up] Today's top story on Triple P ...
AARAV -- Yes to what?
SAI -- Recently acquired lead-off extraordinaire and endearing freak of all of Greece, Quant Kouros signed a six-year extension with the California Crusaders this past week. The deal will pay Kouros $55 million over six seasons ($14.2/$11.5/$8.5/$7.5/$7.5(to)/$6(to)) and ensure the two-time Charles Puckett Award winner will play the heart of what should be his most productive years in a Crusader uniform.
AARAV -- Who said you misheard?
SAI -- The extension with Kouros was a major priority for General Manager Shoeless once the deal landing Kouros in California was made official with Vegas. With more on the extension, our top unpaid intern Wasim Jeffers Jr. is standing by. Wasim?
WASIM -- It's Jaffer. Wasim Jaffer Jr. You've been saying Jeffers ever since we came to California.
SAI -- Jaffer, huh? Odd, I could have sworn it was Jeffers. [turns to Aarav] See, I mishear things all the time. [turns back to the camera] With more on the extension, our top unpaid intern Wasim Jaffer Jr. is standing by. Wasim?
WASIM -- Thank you, Sai. According to one California executive I spoke with, the acquisition and extension of Kouros has many within the organization hopeful the long and successful run by the prior administration will continue under the current GM. But, others pointed to the acquisition of Hakim Ngowa last season as proof to the rumors that GM Shoeless is, in fact, clueless when it comes to general managing a professional sports team. Only time will tell, I suppose.
SAI -- That is true -- not a great take for a sports-talk program, but, I guess, it's the best we can expect from just an intern.
WASIM -- What the...
SAI -- Were you able to speak to GM Shoeless concerning the extension?
WASIM -- Just an intern? [turns away from the camera while mouthing a count to ten; turns back to the camera] I wasn't able to get a quote from GM Shoeless on the matter. I hate to speculate, especially as I'm just an intern, but something is not right with our general manager lately. Normally, he's very much a creature of habit -- eats the same breakfast and watches film at 9 every morning; BMs are regular and healthy. But, lately, he's been aloof. I often see him mumbling to himself and looking towards the sky. He looks like he hasn't had a good night's sleep in weeks. It's all just ... odd.
SAI -- I was informed to say it's just the stress of the pennant chase.
WASIM -- Hmm, I suppose that would ...
AARAV -- Wait. Wait. Wait. Who's informing you of these things, Sai? Who said that?
SAI -- Well, that wraps up another episode of Triple P. We'll be seeing you at the ballpark, Crusader fans!