41.26 Open Letter to David Simpson

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41.26 Open Letter to David Simpson

Post by shoeless.db » Wed Feb 12, 2020 9:04 am

Dear David Simpson,

Hey, would you mind pretending to be half the ballplayer you've shown yourself to be the past two seasons? I mean, the Crusaders are four games down to some squad from Canada all because your sorry ass decided to mail in 2041. You're about 50 points down in both batting average and on base percentage from a year ago, and, frankly, I can't keep declining Anton Vogts requests to have you analyzed by team doctor Dr. Frankenham Kocherschmeltz. Vogts is certain an afternoon appointment could correct some issues in your swing and the amount of effort you bring to the games.

There were streaks last year where you completely carried the squad offensively. You were our lone hero in a train wreck of a lineup. Now, this season, with several younger players having breakout years, like Po-sin Shi and Jorge Lugo, you decide to shit the bed.

I'm waiting for the real David "Horrible" Simpson who is rummaging inside that sorry sack of a man you've been this season to burst out of all this funk. Why don't you ponder the crazy idea of throwing this talented team of misfits on your back and carrying us straight to a Landis?

Get your poop in a group!

GM Shoeless
California Crusaders
Life is a bit more beautiful when time is measured by the half inning rather than the half hour. -- db "Shoeless" Olmsted

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Re: 41.26 Open Letter to David Simpson

Post by bschr682 » Wed Feb 12, 2020 9:45 am

He is certainly living up to his nickname...
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Re: 41.26 Open Letter to David Simpson

Post by HoosierVic » Wed Feb 12, 2020 10:46 am

Hmm. And grouped poop is somehow desirable? Vinnie might need to look into using this approach with Moelling ...

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Re: 41.26 Open Letter to David Simpson

Post by jleddy » Wed Feb 12, 2020 12:49 pm

Looking at his game log, looks like he was doing fine until July arrived. Wasn't that about the same time that the California General Manager returned from a mid-season vacation? I think Simpson (and the league as a whole) would benefit if Shoeless took some time away again...
"My $#!? doesn't work in the playoffs." - Billy Beane Joe Lederer

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Re: 41.26 Open Letter to David Simpson

Post by bcslouck » Wed Feb 12, 2020 1:02 pm

I'll take him off your hands.
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Re: 41.26 Open Letter to David Simpson

Post by jleddy » Wed Feb 12, 2020 1:06 pm

bcslouck wrote:
Wed Feb 12, 2020 1:02 pm
I'll take him off your hands.
Shoeless or Simpson?
"My $#!? doesn't work in the playoffs." - Billy Beane Joe Lederer

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Re: 41.26 Open Letter to David Simpson

Post by bcslouck » Wed Feb 12, 2020 1:17 pm

jleddy wrote:
Wed Feb 12, 2020 1:06 pm
Shoeless or Simpson?
That's a silly question. Would anyone take Shoeless?
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Re: 41.26 Open Letter to David Simpson

Post by jleddy » Wed Feb 12, 2020 1:18 pm

One can dream!
"My $#!? doesn't work in the playoffs." - Billy Beane Joe Lederer

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Re: 41.26 Open Letter to David Simpson

Post by shoeless.db » Wed Feb 12, 2020 4:32 pm

bcslouck wrote:
Wed Feb 12, 2020 1:17 pm
jleddy wrote:
Wed Feb 12, 2020 1:06 pm
Shoeless or Simpson?
That's a silly question. Would anyone take Shoeless?
Good luck. My wife's been trying to get rid of me since we met.
California Crusaders
Life is a bit more beautiful when time is measured by the half inning rather than the half hour. -- db "Shoeless" Olmsted

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