PPP: Camacho Gone 2040.19

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PPP: Camacho Gone 2040.19

Post by shoeless.db » Mon Nov 18, 2019 3:44 pm

Popes Playing Pepper
with Sai and Aarav

SAI -- Welcome to another edition of Triple P. I'm your host, Sai "Young" Ahuji, and with me, as always, is his high school's sixth chair flutist, Aarav "the Mad Pope of Mumbai" Patil.

AARAV -- Fifth chair.

SAI -- That doesn't make it better. Anyway, moving on to today's top story --

Our own top unpaid intern, Wasim Jeffers Jr., is reporting Crusader's outfielder, Carlos Camacho, jumped from the back of the team bus as it was traveling at a high speed on Interstate 40 after Thursday's 4-3 victory over the Bluebirds in Nashville. Several witnesses, including many Crusader ballplayers and staff, stated something beyond comprehension happened when he was in mid-air. For more on this developing story, Wasim is on location in Nashville. Wasim?

Image
Carlos Camacho

WASIM -- Thank you, Sai. Yes, many witnesses are corroborating the same unbelievable story. They insist they saw a form resembling a giant eagle with the head of a, I guess, what they can only describe as a donkey descend from the sky. It reached out with mist-like talons and grasped Camacho in the air. The two ascended over the hills and flew out of sight.

SAI -- That sounds absolutely insane.

WASIM -- Exactly my thoughts, but, man, I tell you, these guys all swear they saw it happen. Here, let me just play you some audio I have from my interview with first baseman, Andy Seekins:

[begin audio]

SEEKINS -- F*ck, I've seen some crazy sh*t in my life, and I've been around some real tool-f*cks, but that son of a b*tch kept going on and on about how this f*ckin' evil was gonna get us, and some phantom c*nt was coming to sort sh*t out. I was sitting right, god-damn, near him on that f*ckin' bus when he turned to Sarge -- you see, Sarge was trying to keep that bastard under his thumb so he didn't ruin our damn team and sh*t -- anyway, that ass-wipe told Sarge the time had come and that some Strix-ass-mother-f*cker, or some sh*t like that was comin'. That bastard just turned and opened the back of the f*ckin' bus. Then, that sh*t for brains jumped his idiot ass straight out. That's when that f*ckin' devil bird came down and plucked his ass from the sky like some movie and sh*t.

[end audio]

SAI -- Wow, that's crazy. And, it's a good reminder never to have Seekins on the show.

AARAV -- No doubt. Even my aunt doesn't swear like that after a couple swigs of whiskey, and they call her the Pirate Queen on account of her swearing.

SAI -- That was your aunt? I thought that was your grandpa.

AARAV -- No, that was my aunt. My family is known for its handsome women.

WASIM -- [still on location] Uh, hey guys? Remember, we did just have a mystical bird come down and snatch up one of our players.

SAI -- Oh, yes, yes... Sorry. Team officials confirm Camacho has not been seen or heard from since the incident. And, due to the circumstances of his disappearance, Camacho was released from the team.

WASIM -- Incredible.

SAI -- Well, thanks for tuning in for another episode of Triple P. I'm Sai Ahuji, and we'll be seeing you at the ballpark.
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Re: PPP: Camacho Gone 2040.19

Post by HoosierVic » Mon Nov 18, 2019 4:15 pm

Oh dear. I'm going to be sorely disappointed if Camacho doesn't reappear, riding the donkey bird, for the 7th inning stretch at a Crusaders home game.

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Re: PPP: Camacho Gone 2040.19

Post by shoeless.db » Mon Nov 18, 2019 5:58 pm

HoosierVic wrote:
Mon Nov 18, 2019 4:15 pm
Oh dear. I'm going to be sorely disappointed if Camacho doesn't reappear, riding the donkey bird, for the 7th inning stretch at a Crusaders home game.
*donkeagle
Sacramento Mad Popes (unretired)
-- Vic Caleca Team News Award Winner 2052
-- BBA Champion 2053
-- Pacific Champs 2040, 2042, 2043, 2047, 2048, 2049, 2051, 2053, 2054
Life is a bit more beautiful when time is measured by the half inning rather than the half hour.

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Re: PPP: Camacho Gone 2040.19

Post by jleddy » Mon Nov 18, 2019 6:00 pm

Don Keagle, new custom ammy.
"My $#!? doesn't work in the playoffs." - Billy Beane Joe Lederer

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Re: PPP: Camacho Gone 2040.19

Post by shoeless.db » Mon Nov 18, 2019 6:11 pm

jleddy wrote:
Mon Nov 18, 2019 6:00 pm
Don Keagle, new custom ammy.
Don’t you dare even think I wouldn’t!

Don “Cult of Camacho” Keagle.
Sacramento Mad Popes (unretired)
-- Vic Caleca Team News Award Winner 2052
-- BBA Champion 2053
-- Pacific Champs 2040, 2042, 2043, 2047, 2048, 2049, 2051, 2053, 2054
Life is a bit more beautiful when time is measured by the half inning rather than the half hour.

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Re: PPP: Camacho Gone 2040.19

Post by HoosierVic » Mon Nov 18, 2019 6:19 pm

This must happen.

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