Hosted by the queen of sass and stats, Gertie herself!
Player of the Year: Charlie WalshGertie says:
"Oh sweet baby biscuits, this man did it all! A .359 average? Check. 20 stolen bases? Yup. 47 ribbies and 9 long balls? Honey, he didn’t march—he *sprinted* across those basepaths like a man on a mission. WAR of 2.3? He’s the full meal deal. Somebody build him a statue—I'll knit the scarf!"
Charlie’s Top Stats:
- AVG: .359
- OBP: .434
- SLG: .550
- OPS: .984
- Runs Created: 64.3
- WAR: 2.3
- Stolen Bases: 20
Pitcher of the Year: Cyril StratisGertie says:
"Now this man didn’t just throw darts—he painted the corners like Monet. A 3.61 ERA, 66 punchies in 57.1 innings, and he held batters to a .249 average? Chile please! That’s art. I haven’t seen that kind of finesse since I tried flamenco on a cruise ship!"
Cyril’s Top Stats:
- ERA: 3.61
- Innings Pitched: 57.1
- Strikeouts: 66
- Opponent AVG: .249
- WHIP: 1.45
- WAR: 1.6
Hitter of the Year: Naosuke KitakawaGertie says:
"Naosuke was smoother than silk and louder than fireworks on the Fourth. .346 average with a .966 OPS? Lord have mercy! And 5 bombs with 17 doubles? That boy turned singles into symphonies and pitchers into puddles."
Naosuke’s Top Stats:
- AVG: .346
- OBP: .433
- SLG: .533
- OPS: .966
- Runs Created: 43.5
- RBI: 31
- Doubles: 17
Congratulations to all the Marching Ants! 
Stay tuned for Gertie’s "Ant Fashion Power Rankings" next week. Spoiler alert: Paul Quigley's cleats are NOT safe...
