51.5 Notorious Draftmeister Otto Pyck Resurfaces in Chi-town

[tylertoo]

Notorious Draftmeister Otto Pyck Resurfaces in Chi-town

Chicago, April 28, 2051 - First it was in the (late lamented) UMEBA for Tripoli, then in Edmonton. And now the infamous draftmeister Otto Pyck -- after after a mysterious absence of three seasons -- has resurfaced in Chicago, apparently taking charge of the Black Sox 2051 amateur draft.

Otto, back where he belongs,
in the draftroom.

Sources tell Black Sox Baseball Blog that Pyck's return was due primarily to the complete apathy of the Black Sox front office with the current draft class. "We can't bring ourselves to spend time making lists and lists when you're basically getting replacement level players," said one source. "Sure, some of these guys will surprise us in a few years, but that's still a crapshoot. Hence, we called up Otto."

Otto himself refused to say what he's been up to for the past three years. He first rose to fame in 2046, when the now-defunct Tripoli Pirahnas, also run at the time by Mike Dunn, decided to turn over drafting duties to Pyck, who was then the clubhouse janitor. "It ain't rocket science," Pyck said at the time. He also noted that Michael Best at the time had the biggest schlong in UMEBA. (Pyck's first pick that year was Rusty Davis, now a minor leaguer in the Boise Spuds system).

The following year, after a stop in rehab, Pyck surfaced in the Brewster for the Edmonton Jackrabbits. Pyck at the time provided reporters the insightful observation that the MBBA draft was different than UMEBA's because it has more teams. "What I've determined is that if there are more teams, there are more draft picks. So instead of being on the clock every ten picks, you are on the clock every 32 picks. It's fascinating."

Pyck reacts to missing out on Jo Mama

But after the 2047 draft, Pyck disappeared. Reports at the time speculated that he'd had a relapse one of his various addictions. Other sources indicated that he had moved to the island of Maui and had decided to study both dental hygiene and transcendental meditation in order to become the world's first transcendental hygienist.

Whatever the truth, Pyck is at it again -- taking over the Black Sox war room for the '51 draft. According to our sources, Pyck exploded and turned over tables when the Phoenix Talons, picking just before Chicago, chose Joseph 'Jo Mama' Mother, who Pyck had coveted for the youngster's bizarre mustache and uniform. "Those motherfuckers fucked me out of Mother," Pyck yelled repeatedly, according to our sources.

In his frustration, Pyck chose the blandly-coiffed Bob Norton, a starting pitcher who most scouts discounted because of poor movement. "Movement schmovement," Otto said in response to criticism that Norton was an ill-advised reach. "I've had bowel movements that can top most of the guys in this draft class." The mention of bowel movements apparently sparked a reminder, and Otto dashed off to the men's room.

[Jwalk100]

I heard he was just sitting around Pycking his nose.