(Black Sox general manager Vic Caleca is seated in the team’s temporary headquarters at the JW Marriott in downtown Chicago. He and Asst. GM Bill McGuffin are seated in the suite that front office executives are using during the offseason while Black Sox Park is being used as overflow impound parking for owner Vinnie Vitale’s towing operation. The two place a Skype call to Vinnie.)
Vinnie Vitale: Vic! McDuff! How you guys doin’?
Sox Owner Vinnie "If You Say So" Vitale
Vinnie: That’s what I said. What’s up?
Caleca: Well, I got this email from you about our budget …
Vinnie: Yeah, yeah. And?
Caleca: You reminded me that we had a $138 million budget and that we hadn’t spent much of it …
Vinnie: Yeah.
Caleca: So, I took care of it.
Vinnie: Uh … what do you mean you took care of it?
Caleca: I did what you suggested and spent some money.
Vinnie: OK. Um, how much money?
Caleca: Oh, about $14 million this season and – maybe - $12 million next season.
Vinnie: Maybe?
Caleca: Well, the contract has an opt out … we put it in there as a little bit of a fail safe.
Vinnie: Contract … should we back up? Did you sign somebody to improve our left field situation, like I asked?
Caleca: Well, no. That doesn’t make sense anyway. Fernando Reyes is a decent left fielder – we don’t need to upgrade him.
Mark Wareham
Caleca: We signed Mark Wareham to a two-year contract to be our starting shortstop.
Vinnie: OK. Uh, is he good? Is he better than that Sandy fella we got now?
Caleca: Yeah, he’s better than Morales. He’s good in the field … he hits about as well, but he gets on base a hell of a lot more – he draws a ton of walks. We’ll probably bat him leadoff to help set the table for Simpson and Cochran and the rest.
Vinnie: Uh huh. And he’s worth $14 million?
Caleca: Well, that’s what he cost. Don’t worry, Vinnie. It’s a short contract, and like you keep reminding me, we’ve got the money.
Vinnie: If you say so ….
Caleca: Well, we gotta try something, right?
Vinnie: If you say so … Hey – I got a question: did you ever hear back from Heidi Hickman?
Caleca: I haven’t talked to her yet, but I relayed your message on her voice mail, and I had kind of an odd voice mail message myself overnight.
Vinnie: What kinda voice mail message?
Caleca: It just said “Hellscape here. Message received.” I couldn’t tell if it was Heidi or not – the voice was pitched lower and there was kind of a weird echo effect, like she was calling from a big room or a cave or something.
Vinnie: Had to be her. Who else is gonna call and say it was Hellscape?
Caleca: Probably so. I’m calling her back today. I’ll let you know what I hear.
Vinnie: Yeah. You do that. And Vic?
Caleca: Yeah?
Bill McGuffin
Caleca: Sweet. Glad to allay your fears.
Bill McGuffin: Yep, we’re here for you, boss!
Vinnie: Great, MacDormand. Don’t be a suck up.
McGuffin: Ok, sir. Done sucking up, sir.
Vinnie: Jesus. Goodbye.
[Call ends]
McGuffin: That went well, don't you think?
Caleca: Jesus.
[Recording ends]