(It’s early afternoon and Black Sox GM Vic Caleca is driving north on the Bishop Ford Expressway towards Calumet City in South Side Towing truck CC04. He’s towing a late model Mercedes that had been parked in a Chicago residential district, blocking the driveway of a City Council member. The phone rings, Caleca sees it’s Sox owner Vinnie Vitale and answers using voice command.)
Vic Caleca: Hey Vinnie, what’s up?
Vinnie Vitale: Hey, Vic. You driving?
GM Vic Caleca
Vinnie: Ouch! You taking it to the stadium?
Caleca: Yep – Billy wants it in a secure lot, so … probably somewhere in center field, would be my guess.
Vinnie: See? Am I a genius or what for figuring out how to use Sox Park in the offseason?
Caleca: You’re a regular Stephen Hawking, Vinnie.
Vinnie: Who?
Caleca: Hawking? Brilliant physicist in a wheelchair? No?
Vinnie: A wheelchair? What was wrong with him?
Caleca: He had ALS - Lou Gehrig’s disease …
Vinnie: Huh. Genius. Had a disease named for a Hall of Famer … OK. I take it as a compliment.
Caleca: You had me worried there, Vinnie.
Vinnie: Yeah, yeah. I’m sure. Hey … I want you to call Heidi Hickman for me.
Caleca (gasps): Heidi? Jesus, Vinnie. We didn’t exactly part on the best of terms … She pissed me off and I called her Helga after I fired her. She was not happy.
Vinnie: Yeah. Well, you’d have a better shot at talking to her than me .
Heidi Hickman
Vinnie: My point exactly.
Caleca (sighs): OK, why do you want me to call Heidi?
Vinnie: I need you to ask her a question for me …
Caleca: Yeah? What’s that?
Vinnie: Who’s Kate?
Caleca: Kate? I don’t know anyone named Kate.
Vinnie: No, no. I’m not asking you. That’s what I want you to ask her.
Caleca: Ah. OK. So, what’s the significance of Kate?
Vinnie: A couple of my … associates … talked with a guy named Ron O’Malley, who was driving the truck that dumped the pig shit in the Little Cal … you know, the truck that Heidi got the video of.
Caleca: Yep, yep, yep. The night Mark Simpson re-injured his ankle.
Vinnie: You got it. Anyway, Mr. O’Malley said that a young lady named Kate gave him and the other crew members a lot of cash to dump that manure in the river instead of downstate, where it was supposed to go.
Caleca: You think Heidi knows who that is? Why?
Vinnie: Because someone tipped her off to be there at just the right time and just the right place. I may not be no … what was the guy’s name? Huebler?
Caleca: You mean Hawking?
Vinnie: That’s him. I may not be no Hawthorne, but I can add 2 and 2 and come up with the idea that maybe Kate tipped Heidi to be there.
Caleca: OK. Yeah, you might be on to something there.
Vinnie: See? I am a Stephen Horton …
Caleca: Hawking …
Vinnie: Whoever.
Caleca: The only flaw there is … um … Heidi’s pretty pissed at us still, and she doesn’t owe us anything.
Vinnie: Except that I didn’t sue her ass for leaking confidential team intellectual property to the media.
Caleca: Something tells me that suit wouldn’t have gone real far.
Vinnie: Yeah, but it would have made her life miserable and cost her a pretty penny in hiring an attorney and all that. You might just mention that if she gives you any lip.
Caleca: Whatever. I’ll try her old mobile number and if that doesn’t work, I’ll call the team offices over in Yellow Springs.
Vinnie: Yeah, sounds good.
Caleca: Hey, Vinnie. Could I ask you something now?
Vinnie: Sure. Why not?
Sox owner Vinnie "Stephen Hawthorne ... Hawking" Vitale
Vinnie: When someone’s a threat to me and mine, I make it a point to know their name. And Heidi’s a threat, make no mistake.
Caleca: Yeah. OK. Well, I’m pulling up to the ballpark, so I gotta figure out where Billy wants me to put the Mercedes.
Vinnie: I got a five-spot that says deep left …
Caleca: You’re on. I say shallow center.
Vinnie: Let me know. And call me after you talk to Heidi.
Caleca: Uh, huh. Hang on ... (Lowers truck window and yells to a South Side employee directing tow truck traffic) Hey, Lenny! Where’s Billy want the Benz to go?
Lenny: Out in left, along the warning track.
Vinnie (who’s still on the line): I knew it! You owe me $5, Caleca!
Caleca: Son of a … you set that up with Billy, didn’t ya?
Vinnie: I don’t know nuthin’ about nuthin’. Maybe Heidi can tell ya!
(Call ends)
Caleca: Damn it. If Mumbai won’t take me back, maybe Beirut needs an assistant GM …
[Recording ends]