(Black Sox GM Vic Caleca is driving Southside Towing truck CC14 north on the Bishop Ford Freeway on a sunny January morning, en route to pick up an abandoned Nissan Rogue along the shoulder near the East 130th Street Interchange. His dash-mounted iPhone rings, he sees the caller is Sox owner Vinnie Vitale, so he answers.)
Vic Caleca: Hey, Vinnie. What’s up?
Vinnie Vitale: Vic, my man. You drivin’ today?
Sox owner Vinnie "The Philanthropist" Vitale
Caleca: Yep. There’s a broken down Nissan out here with my name on it.
Vinnie: A broken down Nissan, eh? Is there any other kind?
Caleca: Nissans aren’t bad. I pick up more Chevys and Buicks than Nissans.
Vinnie (snorts): Don’t doubt it. Hey, I wanted to call and let you know what a kind generous soul you work for.
Caleca: Oh yeah? You sold the team? (Laughs)
Vinnie: You are one phone call to Billy away from permanent overnights there, son.
Caleca: Oh c’mon, Vinnie. We kid because we love.
Vinnie: You worry me sometimes, Caleca.
Caleca: There’s a long list of those folks, Vinnie. You’re gonna have to get in line.
Vinnie: Snakes around the block, does it?
Caleca: Couple of times, yeah.
Vinnie: OK. Well, here’s the deal: I huddled with our accountants a little while ago and the revenue projections for the season are looking good.
Caleca: Oh. Well, hell. That’s good to hear!
Vinnie: Yep. And from your perspective, this’ll be even better: I’m raising your budget $4 million, up to $120 million.
Caleca (spots the Nissan on the shoulder ahead, and hits the tow truck’s flashers): Well, geez, Vinnie. That’s nice of you!
Vinnie: Yeah, well, remember that league bio of me you mentioned awhile ago that said how generous I am?
Caleca: I do, indeed.
Vinnie: Well, they were so right. I’m downright philanthropic.
Caleca: Vinnie the charitable. We’ll build you a statue in front of Sox Park!
Vinnie (clearly intrigued): Hey, Caleca. You’ve had worse ideas. You know any sculptors?
Caleca (Pulling the truck off on the shoulder in front of the Nissan): Do I know any sculptors? Um, I’m gonna have to go with ‘no’ on that one. We could have Rutledge play first base for a couple innings per game. He's like a statue.
Vinnie: No, no, no. Don't do that. I’ll try Googling it …
Caleca: Yeah, you do that, Vinnie.
Vinnie: Hey, I gave you permission for one trade. You do anything about that?
Caleca: Not yet. I talked to a couple of guys, and on one I decided the pitchers I was looking at weren’t quite what we needed, and on the other … well, I got cold feet.
Vinnie: You wussed, huh?
Caleca: Big time.
Vinnie: You’re kinda pathetic, really.
Caleca: Hah. You’re tellin’ me. Well, Vinnie, I gotta go. The Nissan owner seems frantic to get this show on the road.
Vinnie: Yeah. Paying customers come first. I’ll need the money after that budget boost (laughs).
Caleca: Thanks again, for that. We’ll do our best to spend it well.
Vinnie: One thing I have no doubt at all about is that you’ll spend it …
Caleca: No question. See ya.
[Call and recording end.]