September 10, 2050
by Banjo Jackson
Nashville, TN
The BBA was in a state of mourning last week as news broke that Nashville Bluebirds team owner for more than half a century, Hank Bones, passed in the hospital after a bout with skin cancer. Bones purchased the Washington Bobwhites in 1996 before reluctantly relocating the team to Halifax and rebranding as the Hawks in an attempt to appease new GM, @crobillard. The team would move again in 2033, this time to Nashville as the Goats before being rebranded as the Bluebirds in 2039. The sunblock magnate lived in the warmer weather of his hometown of Honolulu for the past decade, rarely stepping foot in Nashville.
Bones was a very hands-on owner in his younger days and was known to have his temper decide the fate of several players and personnel. However, many fans began thinking there may be a curse attached to the Bones name, after all, the franchise only took home one championship in his tenure with a measly 11 playoff appearances. The Bones curse was given more credibility this week after son, Michael Bones, was killed in a tragic plane crash on route to Hawaii for his father’s funeral. Michael was handed the reins to the Bluebirds franchise after his father’s passing, but his ill-timed passing puts the team’s future in jeopardy. The younger Bones attended the Wharton School of the University of Pennsylvania and was surprisingly named President of the club in his father’s will. In his spare time, Michael enjoyed flying his own plane and despite his expertise, his solo trip across the Pacific would be his last. While his body has yet to be recovered, the plane’s black box does not sound promising and he was declared dead.
Michael's older brother, Hank Jones, Jr. was expected to assume the role of President upon his father's passing and his presence has been mysteriously absent since his father’s decision.
“We’re all grieving,” said Bluebirds GM, Chad Nason. “We’re in the middle of a pennant race right now and that all seems so unimportant after this past week. I’ll always be grateful to Hank for pulling me out of obscurity and giving me a chance to run this ball club. We’ll be dedicating this season to Hank and will do everything we can to win this one for him. I hope Jr. is ok. It’s tough enough to lose your dad, but losing your little brother, as well is unimaginable. We all grieve differently and we hope to hear from him soon.”
The Bluebirds will wear black band on their jerseys with the initials HB and MB for the remainder of the season.
