Slugger Shavings 2055.2 - Is Kwak wack?
Posted: Wed Jun 28, 2023 8:13 pm
"I don't know, why don't you ask my agent?!" screamed a petulant Semei Kwakou. Kwakou was tired of hearing questions from reporters about his 26M/year contract and whether he was worth even a fraction of that money anymore. The season has not started well for Kwak, who is having the worst season of his career by far. The 26M contract will likely continue for one more season next year since Kwakou has an option to extend it.
"Well, he didn't pick a good time for this," added Sluggers manager Chris Hooper. "Losing Dozie hurt, no doubt about it, but we need players like Kwak to play like themselves. I don't know what's going on. Before this season, I had never seen him switched off, but honestly now I am looking for the damn switch. I know we have other players struggling offensively, but did you ever think Kwak would be last in WAR on the team? I didn't think so."
GM BP has been strangely quiet with the press about this issue, but rumors are starting to circulate in the Louisville dark web about drastic actions that the team could take if things don't turn around. "Look, the owner expects a playoff team here, and we are still working toward that goal," said a cagey GM. "What do you think we will do, waive him? You're drinking too much Sluggers Select bourbon. Things would have to get crazy for something like that to happen. The man is a franchise legend!"
"Well, he didn't pick a good time for this," added Sluggers manager Chris Hooper. "Losing Dozie hurt, no doubt about it, but we need players like Kwak to play like themselves. I don't know what's going on. Before this season, I had never seen him switched off, but honestly now I am looking for the damn switch. I know we have other players struggling offensively, but did you ever think Kwak would be last in WAR on the team? I didn't think so."
GM BP has been strangely quiet with the press about this issue, but rumors are starting to circulate in the Louisville dark web about drastic actions that the team could take if things don't turn around. "Look, the owner expects a playoff team here, and we are still working toward that goal," said a cagey GM. "What do you think we will do, waive him? You're drinking too much Sluggers Select bourbon. Things would have to get crazy for something like that to happen. The man is a franchise legend!"