Dog Eat Dog World
Former Robins bat boy and son of franchise legend livid after dog takes his job.
Lost in the shuffle of a superstacked draft is a young middle infield prospect named Juan Medrano. Juanny Baseball as he is known, is the son of former Robins shortstop turned A-ball manager Orlando Medrano. It was widely assumed that Brooklyn would draft him comically sooner then he should have been drafted. The franchise has been known to do stupid things, almost as if they make moves just for fun and to feed news stories rather then win games. What a crazy concept. Everyone knows the BBA isn't supposed to be fun. Remember kids, this is serious business.
So with 8 out of the first 110 picks belonging to the Robins, it seemed a foregone conclusion that the snot nosed little kid who used to wipe his boogers on Mario Mendez's cap so he'd get more sink on the ball would suit up for the only team he has ever known. For those unaware of his past, Medrano is perhaps the most famous bat boy to ever grace the BBA. During the lean years of 2028-2034, Juan was often selected as the Robins lone representative for the All Star game. A sign of both how good he was and how bad the team sucked. Last summer he left the team to chase his dream.
"This has been my only dream in life.", said Juanny Baseball. "To put on the blue and white pinstripes and run out to the same global coordinates that my father has so many times before me.'
That quote was before the Robins took the field in 2038 with their new bat boy....Buster. Buster the bat boy is the Robins attempt to draw more fans to the park. A four legged furry k-9 who runs on the field to fetch the stray bats when a player puts the ball in play. Juan Medrano didn't take too kindly to the gesture.
"After 11 years of being a bat boy, this is the respect I get? To be replaced by a dog? I mean, this has to be intentional. When I was there I was a spectacle. The greatest bat boy on earth. And in typical Robins fashion, they replace talent with a gimmick. I took a lot of pride in that position and they just fed it to the dogs. So... no way am I signing with them. I'm unsignable to Brooklyn."
The organization is now in damage control mode. Irate fans have called PETA and claim the team is abusing the dog. And the league is looking into tampering and nepotism claims as well. I guess only time will tell if we will ever see Juanny Baseball in the familiar on deck circle at Red Robin Park. But for now, it looks as if that ship has sailed.
