"Back of the Sofa" day (2048-5)

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Fat Nige
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"Back of the Sofa" day (2048-5)

Post by Fat Nige » Wed Aug 25, 2021 7:12 am

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The “back of the sofa” drive


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It was early morning when the UPS driver dropped off his consignment and the Sheikh, on his way out to some luxury villa or another, signed for it and left it right there. When word reached me, I went out to find three sullen players standing around, checking their delivery note I swiftly concluded that the driver had dumped them off at the wrong stadium. Sure, the label said “The Prince’s Palace Stadium Riyadh” but with the attached Schedule of Costs standing at $1,000,000 each item I knew it wouldn’t be for us. Or if it was, the bill wasn’t going to be paid. I dragged them all into our reception area and told them to take a seat while I sorted the mix-up out. They remained standing looking pointedly at our sofas. Oh yes, I remembered, we had just finished our annual “Down the Back of the Sofa” day to raise funds for the Red Crescents. “Well just stand there boys, we’ll have it sorted in no time. If you want a drink in the meantime, Mary can give you change for the vending machine”.


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A successful Down the Sofa day had found almost $1 million for the funds (mainly from the Sheikh’s sofa


I phoned the league office, I phoned the Commissioners office, I phone the secretaries office, I phoned the transitions department, heck I even phoned the league’s secret home for deranged ex-players, but no-one had the slightest idea where these three had come from? I was about to check the morgue in desperation to see if they’d lost three when the phone rang. Answering it, a voice said “Ah, glad I finally caught you, the phone’s been busy for ages. Anyway, I’m just checking you’ve got our care package ?”. “Look who is this” I said in exasperation, “I’ve got a lot to sort here.”. ”OK, old chap, won’t take a moment. This is the British charity ‘Help for Distressed UMEBA Expansion Teams’, we’ve just sent you a care package of three retread players, and a bit of cash. If you check their pockets carefully there’s an envelope with $10 million in it. We also spoke with your Sheikh, thingy-gebob or whatever his name is, and authorised him to top your budget up to $70,000,000. Hope it helps you out, us Brits love the plucky underdogs. Right now, must run, tally-ho!”

As the line went dead, I just stared at the phone. Someone had actually meant to send those three players to us? And with a wad of cash as well as stuffing our bank account too to top it all.


Maybe 2048 wasn’t going to be such a bad season after all
Nigel Laverick
(former GM of El Paso Chilis #WeWereShitty) ,
Now GM Riyadh Red Crescents #WeBeNotSoNewNow #WeAreJustAsShitty


Riyadh GM since May 2046

JL Manager of the Year 2000 (Baltimore Monarchs)
Nothing since


An MBBA GM since 1995 (off & on)

scottsdale_joe
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Re: "Back of the Sofa" day (2048-5)

Post by scottsdale_joe » Wed Aug 25, 2021 11:33 am

:)
Joe - GM UMEBA CAIRO PHARAOHS (2047-xxxx); Vancouver Mounties (1996-2009; 2035-2036); Halifax Hawks (2023-2026)Image LINKS:ImageImageImageImageImage

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