Hammer Time 2046.6- Chickens Come Home to Roost

[chicoruiz]

When I was growing up, I spent a lot of time on my grandpa’s farm. Grandpa had a chicken coop, and occasionally he’d want a chicken dinner on Sunday, and some poor fowl would be singled out to provide the main course. And I remember, if you’d go back into the henhouse right after the poor chicken had met its fate, the remaining ones would all have a certain expression on their little chicken faces… like they knew, somehow. Their eyes would get as big as chicken’s eyes could get, and you could tell they were thinking: what the f*** just happened, and am I gonna be the next one it happens to…

I’ve seen that same expression twice this year on the faces of the Hebrew Hammers: once when Justin Sutherland shredded his arm, and again tonight when our ace, Gary Goodchild, was carted off the field with a knee that was bent in a way knees aren’t supposed to. I sat in on the post-game meeting with manager Zach Hill to lend some support and try to get our hens to calm down and stop all the nervous clucking.

“Okay guys”, he began, “we took a hard hit today, losing Gary, but we just need to remind ourselves that there’s still a lot of talent on this team. Now, Julio is gonna go back into the rotation, and we know he can get the job done- shit, he’s won 12 games this year. If we all just do our jobs, we’ll be fine. Although if one of you wants to step forward and take over the staff ace role… well, that would be just dandy with me”.

When he said that last part, I could sense everyone in the clubhouse looking sideways at Mateus Rabisca. Everyone knew he was the guy we brought in to front the rotation, and so far he’s been barely respectable. Right now we really need him to start pitching like… well, like Mateus Rabisca. If he noticed the eyeballs on him, though, he didn’t act concerned. I guess when you’ve been injured as much as he has, the whole topic of injuries isn’t that much of a big deal.

As the meeting broke up, I thought, oh well, at least Goodchild isn’t absconding to a kibbutz with my secretary like Sutherland did. Although if he did, there would be a silver lining. Tamar would probably be handy to have around at a kibbutz. I’m pretty sure if you harnessed her up she could pull a plow...

[tylertoo]

It is unbelievable the top pitcher in the entire league is lost on the cusp of the playoffs. I think my jaw dropped slight

Thoughts and prayers. (Not really, but it sounds nice).

[mragland]

A torn meniscus while pitching, I'm assuming his plant (right) leg, is just a freak accident, but you can picture how it might happen.

Cruel game.

[shoeless.db]

Sorry, upvoted for the great chicken-butchering metaphor and not the injury. Thought it best to clarify.

[lordtoffee]

Congrats on the title, and glad to see you do something I never did accomplish in the UMEBA.