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PostPosted: Wed Oct 26, 2016 11:05 pm 

Joined: Fri Dec 19, 2014 3:10 pm
Posts: 1154
The European Baseball Alliance has about as much parity as an income per capita chart in a capitalist society: that is, not much. Belfast and Paris are literally the only two teams in the circuit with a positive run differential, boasting figures of +106 and +108, respectively. Laughably, they currently sit second and third in the Western Division, behind the horseshoe swallowing London Bishops, whose Pythag suggests that their record should be somewhere in the neighbourhood of "not leading their fucking division".

Belfast is being led by a mighty pair of power hitters, catcher Joe Castle and DH Fulton Reed, who currently sit first and second in the league in home runs. Indeed, the Northstars' big acquisition, Reed, has TEN more homers than his second-fiddle teammate, despite having joined the league two weeks into the season. Indeed, nearly half of all his hits have left the ballpark entirely. Throw in his 66 walks on the year and you have one hell of a player -- will he survive next season's Rule 6 draft?

Belfast's pitching is less exciting, ranking only third in the league. Still, it doesn't matter at all because the Northstars are just going to go out and slug thirty points above league average, so they could roll out that lady from Pitch (now playing on FOX and FOX on Demand!) and still win ball games.

There's not a lot of doubt that this year's EBA champion will be one of Belfast or Paris, and so of course it'll be Amsterdam or something. Still, it's been a wonderful season for fans of the Northstars, who've suffered through a long period of lackluster baseball. The team surpassed last season's win total a full three weeks ago, and for all intents and purposes have already clinched a playoff berth.

All that's left is to win the damn thing.

Adam Dee
Edmonton Jackrabbits, General Manager
Havana Sugar Kings, General Manager 2022-2027

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